Salesman: So what are you looking for in your new car?
Mom: Mike Rowe.
Salesman: (joking) And, of course, you can't go wrong with a Mustang.
Me: Oh, sure you can.
Salesman: How?
Me: By buying one.
Salesman: That V8 is fun, though.
Me: Until you get to the gas station.
Salesman: Here's what you do. You tell the idiot ogling your car that for $10, you'll take him for a spin around the block.
Me: Yeah, or if you're a girl, you can do this. (leaning over the car in low-cut shirt) "Who wants to fill my tank?" Oh, wait. Shit.
Mom: You're gonna get us kicked out.
Salesman: Not necessarily.
Salesman: (apparently...I didn't hear this...though I heard about it nonstop) I wonder how much pot you'd have to smoke to like this Kiwi Green?
Me: Hey, I really like that Kiwi Green!
Salesman: What features do you really want?
Mom: A moonroof. And Mike Rowe.
Salesman: Okay, who is that?
Mom: ...I don't think I can talk to you anymore.
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8 comments:
Haha I love your mom.
I'm moving it. My brother threw me against the dishwasher and kitchen cabinets and I'm missing parts of my toe and now can't move my neck.
Le fucking sigh.
BWAHAHA Love the Momma!! :)
So what car did she decide on?
Nate -- what the HELL is wrong with your family? Seriously. Your brother needs therapy and/or to be hit with a bat. Is he some closeted ball of hypermasculine self-loathing, or is there really no psychological reason for him being such a prick?
Poodle -- She hasn't made up her mind on the exact type, (because a manual transmission and a moonroof are mutually exclusive because Ford is retarded) but some kind of 2008 Escape. She's trading in the Chrysler for a cracker and a handful of buttons, and JK's getting her current Escape.
Not quite sure what's wrong with Steve. He hates litterally everyone over the smallest things.
Time for a "college" visit to Pittsburgh, eh? ;-)
I'll give her a cracker, handful of buttons, AND some gimp with an ironic t-shirt, but that's just so I can use it for target practice -- that is, after all, all they are good for.
btw..tell her good luck on the manual transmission with sunroof. most SUVs these days are auto...she might just have to settle on getting a sunroof added after-market. My friend, Jess, is having the same issue.
Damn youuuu!! You and Scott have finally convinced me to make a blog account on here :-P
Yeah, that's what I meant -- you can't get the manual with a moonroof. I'm not so sure about getting one after market because I've heard some horror stories. I sort of think she might go with the auto.
Ok, me = stupid, because I don't know who Mike Rowe is. Also, me = nerd because I just looked him up on Wikipedia.
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