Monday, April 16, 2007

las vegas: don't forget that we have whores!

All right, Las Vegas, I get it: you have whores. What I don't understand is how you've based an entire advertising campaign around that fact. And why are you advertising, anyway? Is there anyone anywhere in the world who isn't aware of Las Vegas as a travel destination/place to get syphilis? No. The answer is no.

So how many crappy television ads are you going to force upon us wherein the sole point is to remind us that we can go pay for sex and have convenient ways to cover it up? Because it's legal, but who wants his friends to know that the sole reason he went to Vegas was to pay for sex? Las Vegas: Now With Plausible Alibis!

So here's an idea: let's legalize prostitution everywhere. I know, I know: "Cops" will not be nearly as hilarious. No longer will coked-out morons stumbling around town at 2:00 AM in platforms and mini-skirts get to claim they're just waiting for the bus for our collective hilarity. But we can possibly have our law-enforcement officers working on things that actually matter. And, most importantly, we'll never have to listen to another goddamn ad for Vegas whores. And isn't that what we, as a nation, truly want?

3 comments:

Scottie said...

i whore-heartedly agree. we should legalize prostitution, drugs, and rock & roll.

if we had a whore house on every corner (maybe starbucks could market it as star*ucks) then there wouldn't be any coked-out whores anymore.

why pay 50$ for a crack-ho blowjob when you can pay 55$ for a blowjob from an tall, slim, with whip thai latte and listen to the indigo girls and bob dylan ?

Anonymous said...

My friend had to write a Senior Class Paper. So she chose to write it on how prostitution should be legalized. It was kick-ass.

I think one of her conclusion sentences was, "If they can do it in Vegas, why not here?"

honeykbee said...

Sounds like somebody needs a trip to Vegas...