Thursday, March 09, 2006

amanda tells you what to do (not that you have to listen)

So here's a list of things that have been or are in the process of being phased in or out. So far, this just applies to me, (and some overlap with friends like Trina, though she's probably not with me on the Spaghettios thing) but all six of my loyal readers are invited to adopt these ideas, food items, and snarky comments as tenets in your own lives. It's like Scientology, but without the endorsement of celebrities who have done far too much cocaine. Also, I won't charge you anything to read this.

IN:

Renewed friendships
Body hair
Brunettes
"Campus Ladies"
Spaghettios with Sliced Franks
E85 (ethanol/gasoline hybrid)
Live comedy
Folk singers
Tivo
Long hair
Bohemian-style clothes
Peach-flavored everything
Tea
Early Sunday dinners out
Writing by hand
Gardening
Socialism
Scrambled eggs with ketchup
Same-sex marriage

OUT:

MTV
Foreign-oil dependence
Sitcoms
The guy at work who is my ex's doppelganger
Sleeping until 1 PM
Illiterate pop divas
Pantyhose
Starbucks
Writer's block
CSI
Getting drunk in bars
Intelligent Design
Rick Santorum's political career
Pseudo-reality tv
Engagement rings
South Dakota
High-maintenance relationships
Back pain

2 comments:

Scott said...

You had me at "body hair!" However, I hope by "Spaghettios with Sliced Franks" you mean you actually add your own franks to the spaghettios rather than eat those chemically produced "processed meat-flavored food" that spaghettios like to use. I can't eat canned meat (hey, that rhymes) it just gives me the creeps (oh and chicken is excluded).

However, I do take offense to sitcoms being out. Most sitcoms suck these days, but I still like a select few. :)

OMG, did you see the preview for last night's Drawn Together? I didn't watch because I was sleepy, but I taped it. Apparently the princess gets plastic surgery on her "pussoi" and it comes out looking like joan rivers. hehehehehe

oh, and today's verification: "adufo" That slimy residue around canned meat products?

Scott said...

oh and by the way...did i tell you i'm back on caffeine again? One cup of tea in the morning. Maybe I didn't need to tell you, from the looks of my last comment. ;-)