Monday, September 05, 2005

the reason you will never again see my face

Some guy just emailed me on OKCupid (possibly the worst dating site ever... it kept pairing me with Dungeons & Dragons players). This is, verbatim, what he wrote to me.

Will you hookup with me tomorrow night at my house for the promise of me making you snort a margarita through your nose while give you an orgasm and all at the same time.

Or in plain language. May I be one of your sex partners please??!! :p

His profile gives me no insight as to why he'd compose such a horrible message. All it says is that he's 27, male, (of course...) and lives a mere twelve miles from me. No picture. No profile. And yet he knows what I look like.

I fear that he will kidnap me in Giant Eagle some day. I'm going to have to start wearing a burqa.

4 comments:

cindy said...

If anyone so much as touches my wife in the Gian' Eagle they will have to answer to ME and their punishment will be having their own sack served to them on a platter.

Scott said...

mmmm sack... "Pardon? Garcon? May I have the platter du sack? Merci!"

SpangledAngel said...

Watch out, Cyrano deBergerac. This guy's a-movin' in!

Seriously, what hath Al Gore wrought now that people can leave semi-anonymous virtual propositions, whilst all the while knowing exactly what you look like?

Platter du sack, party of two!

honeykbee said...

What? A margarita and an orgasm? Sounds good to me...